58. “I've never been so scared in my entire life. And I've never felt more alive.”
The movie Civil War gives an insight into the importance of risk in job and life fulfilment.
Last weekend I saw Civil War, Alex Garland’s dystopian war movie set in a conflict-riven USA in the near future. Garland is very careful not to allow quick judgements about the sides involved; the ‘rebels’ are California AND Texas, the so-called Western Forces, not usually seen as political intimates. However, it’s not really a war movie; the war is the backdrop for the story, about four war journalists and photographers setting out on a road trip of some 800 miles in search of the ultimate scoop.
I enjoyed it more than I was expecting. The premise is audacious, the construction plausible, some of the set-piece scenes brutal, all amidst the incongruous sunshine of a northeastern spring. The four journalists all have plausible characters which are well set-up in the first hour of the film. The key relationship is between hardened old pro photojournalist Lee (played by Kirsten Dunst) and young ingenue Jessie (rising star Cailee Spaeny) who blags a ride. The two develop a kind of reluctant mentoring partnership; Lee didn’t want Jessie along, but now she’s here she needs a helping hand.
“I've never been so scared in my entire life. And I've never felt more alive.”
There’s a key scene (no spoiler) about 40% of the way into the film. The journalists get alongside some rebel fighters in a shootout, with Lee and Jessie taking picture from behind concrete pillars and the like. There is blood and death. It’s tough stuff and they’re very much at risk. Afterwards, reflecting on the event while Jessie processes her film in a hand developing tank (she’s using old-school light sensitive emulsion while Lee is digital), she says:
“I've never been so scared in my entire life. And I've never felt more alive.”
That’s not an original thought, of course, but it sits beautifully in the context of the emerging story line. There are people right next to you being shot, wounded and killed. Your role, as an accredited press journalist with a press pass and helmet, is not to fight but to document what’s happening. So they’re not supposed to shoot you, but in the heat of battle who knows what might happen. And at the same time, can you stay focused enough (in both senses of the word) to stay alert, shoot pictures, capture the moment? Lee says that her ratio of pictures taken to ‘keeper’ is about 30:1. One of Jessie’s pictures is definitely a keeper.
Holding risk and safety together
This set me thinking about how we balance risk and safety in a humane and effective organisation. Jessie, Lee and their colleagues are at extreme risk in this venture. How could it be allowed? Isn’t it all just too much? The answer to that question is clearly ‘No, it’s not too much’. There are factors in play here which make it acceptable.
First of all, war correspondents are clearly volunteers. Nobody is forcing them to go out there and put their lives on the line. (This can be seen as clearly different from the fighters, particularly if they are conscripted.) They are choosing to do it, presumably because they think their stories and images will make a difference. This is made clear in the movie, through old hand Lee does wonder why all the stories she’s sent back from foreign wars telling people that war is dreadful seem to have had so little impact in the current situation). Legendary war correspondent Marie Colvin (1956-2012) wrote about the importance of shining a light on "humanity in extremes, pushed to the unendurable", stating:
"My job is to bear witness. I have never been interested in knowing what make of plane had just bombed a village or whether the artillery that fired at it was 120mm or 155mm.”
Secondly, they have experience and know-how of how to do it (or in Jessie’s case, are learning fast from people who do know). You need the kit – not just the cameras but the vests, the accreditation, the identification, the sense of when to step forward and when to keep out of the way. A second or two can make all the difference.
Thirdly they quickly gain the trust of those with whom they are working. The fighters are familiar with the role of the press and mostly want to help them get the story. So, the correspondents are alongside the fighters, not trying to take some kind of phony neutral position between the engaging forces. Presumably there are press with the other side too (although we never see them in the movie). What’s more, the fighters are looking out for the journalists, telling them when to stay back and when to move. It’s interesting that one of the most tense scenes in the film is not in the thick of the fighting but on an isolated farm where a few combatants seem free to make their own life-or-death decisions on the spur of the moment. Later in the movie we meet official ‘embedded’ press reporters; they are having a better time of it with full field kit, full access… but they have to stick with ‘their’ battalion whereas our heroes are freelance.
It's World Press Freedom Day this Friday. In the past year 99 journalists were killed in war zones – up 44% on the year before. Particularly at risk are Palestinian journalists in Gaza, and environmental journalists in places like the Amazon. The search for the truth can come at a horrific cost.
To sum up, what makes this enormously risky endeavour acceptable is free choice, experience and know-how, and relationships with others in the same boat. To send people to do it without experience or support would clearly be shocking inhumane (and probably ineffective) treatment.
Putting yourself out there
Being a war correspondent is clearly at the extreme end of balancing risk and security. But what about the kinds of risks we are all maybe called upon to weigh up? As a facilitator and consultant I have been called in to help people in difficult and often stressful situations over the years. Did I get nervous and apprehensive? Yes, sure. That’s probably quite useful for beforehand, when you’re stretching to get things as prepared as possible. On the day though, it’s much more useful to take the open and accepting stance of the improvisor; say ‘Yes’ to what’s happening and seek to build on it in a useful direction. I remember the late Harrison Owen talking about how he meditated extensively before setting up Open Space, particularly when there was known conflict and tension.
I have had this experience so many times in my life; near-crippling nervousness at something coming up, wondering why I ever put myself in this position… and then the event happens, it all goes well (or at least OK), it’s a great relief and on to the next thing. I don’t think that the feeling of fulfilment and success would be possible without the preliminary anxiety and stress. And, like Lee and Jessie, I chose it, was equipped for it, and built relationships around it that all contributed.
This is happened to me many times in musical settings. I love jazz jam sessions. To me, they seem to be the purest form of the music; a group of musicians assemble with no rehearsal, no prior agreement or even no knowledge of each other. Someone calls the tune and off they go, using a common vocabulary to make musical sense in the moment. I used to host the jam sessions at the Cheltenham International Jazz Festival some years ago and wrote about it for the Jazz Mann website in 2012; one of my very first pieces of journalism.
Participating in a jam session is, for me anyway, a nerve-racking experience. You never know which tune will be called, and while it’s possible to object to it, that’s not really the thing to do. So, the experience can be one of hanging on, listening to the way the tune works as it goes, bluffing furiously, getting some handles on where the harmonies change or the ‘middle eight’ section comes as a change of key, and then doing your best. And you emerge at the other end, hopefully with dignity intact, with the audience and most (at least) of the musicians not being too aware of the struggle. And then it’s all OK, people enjoyed it, and it’s a great feeling to do that.
One of the most extreme experiences I had like this was at a big jazz gig to celebrate saxophonist Andy Hamilton in Birmingham in 1984. It was my 25th birthday by coincidence, and I went along to a large pub where the great and good of the jazz scene were gathering. Andy was a lovely guy, Jamaican by birth, who had been Erroll Flynn’s bandleader on the latter’s yacht in the Caribbean before setting in the West Midlands. I sat in along with Stan Rouse, one of the better tenor sax players who was much more experienced then me. That was fine, with only the usual nerves. Then at the end of the night Andy started picking people for the big finale. Legendary drummer Tony Levin stepped in, a West Indian pianist, then Andy pointed to Stan and me! OMG. Thankfully there was no time to worry, we just got on stage and went for it. I came home buzzing. Andy was later ‘discovered’ by a wider public, made two albums with all-star support and was awarded MBE. He died in 2009. Here he is in 1991 with one of his signature numbers, Silvershine.
A good enough holding of anxiety
One of my favourite expressions when it comes to working with complexity and uncertainty comes from the late organisational theorist Ralph Stacey. He heard people talking about the need for a ‘safe environment’ when it came to dialogic workshops and was fond of pointing out that, even if a completely safe environment could be conjured up, it would be next to useless; without risk there would be no prospect of progress. What was needed was rather a ‘good enough holding of anxiety’. People can be justified in being anxious; the key thing is that the anxiety is held so that conversations could ensue and new futures contemplated in a spirit of inclusion.
I think this is an absolutely key distinction for those of us working in organisations. Those who seek ‘safe’ spaces often seem to only mean safety for themselves. Safety can then come to be seen as an end in itself, rather than a useful step along the way to something better. The current disruption of US university campuses by committed and perhaps over-zealous supporters of causes in the Middle East is an example of this trend. When my safety can be equated with your anxiety, we are falling into a trap. Of course we want to make places feel safe for those arriving in them – but that’s about helping them feel welcome. Good leaders, managers and hosts will be keen to welcome people regardless of their positions, in the interests of common humanity, inclusivity and democratic expression.
Conclusion
Improvisation guru Keith Johnstone once wrote that the world was divided into people who say ‘Yes’ and people who say ‘No’.
“There are people who prefer to say 'yes' and there are people who prefer to say 'no'. Those who say 'yes' are rewarded by the adventures they have. Those who say 'no' are rewarded by the safety they attain.”
I think I’ve turned from a No person into (broadly) a Yes person over the years. Even if saying Yes leads to anxiety, concern, risk, exposure and potential disaster, the rewards so often outweigh it. And, like the war correspondents with whom we started, the issues of free choice, experience and relationships are key in tackling and coming through these times of uncertainty and risk. Simply making life ‘safer’ is not, of itself, a way to progress and fulfilment, particularly in a humane and effective organisation.
Dates and Mates
Lots of dates this week!
On Friday it’s SF24, the annual online global festival of Solution Focus. The event is hosted in Australasia, Asia, Europe/Africa and the Americas as the sunlight sweeps around the planet, so there is something for everyone. I am doing a session with Paul Z Jackson on the new third edition of The Solutions Focus book (now available for pre-order) at 1pm-2pm UK time.
I am also leading sessions about the Journal of Solution Focused Practices, who we are, what we do, how to write for the journal, and answering any questions. These are at (all UK times):
5.30-6am: Australasian section (with Andreea Zak, research editor)
3-4pm: Europe/Africa section (with Anton Stellamans, conceptual article editor)
7-7.30pm: Americas section (with Cecil Walker, opinion piece editor)
The great thing about SF24 is that you only have to register once, and you get access for any or all sessions right around the clock. And it’s FREE! To register go to:
https://www.solutionfocus24.com/
And of course next week it’s the UK publication of the long awaited third edition of The Solutions Focus book on Thursday 9 May. More on that next time. US readers will have to wait until 18 September - sorry about that. In the meantime you can take a look at the sparkly new website to support the book, where you can also pre-order it for delivery on publication day.
